Wednesday, October 8, 2008
What clothes can do for you!?!?
so I'm feeling much better today, I decided to wear my dress clothes to work today, I figured it would do me a favor along the lines of my confidence....and it certainly helped....not as much as I had hoped but it did help. One thing I noticed is how many people actually know me, and consider me a friend. I usually don't dress real nice, just some cargo pants and a comfy shirt...but when I got all spiffied up in me dress clothes everyone had a much more desirable reaction to my being there. When I went to lunch today, I went to the grocery store first(were I used to work) and I saw my friend Travis...when he finally realised who I was, he acted like seeing me all fancied up made his day, he wanted to go to lunch with me, said I was really cheerin him up(I don't think hes gay), a few of the other people I worked with also said I looked pretty good....After I left there I headed to subway to get a sandwich and a couple cookies...and even the workers there commented on me being all dressed up....I don't really know any of them, I just eat there every once in a while, but they still noticed....while at work I made a $340 sale with little effort, something that is very difficult to do at this particular job, but the customer did seem to trust me more than they did when I was in my regular "work t-shirt" uniform....I wore the clothes I wore today knowing that all the other times I had worn them, I was in a high confidence state, I went to Indianapolis, IN and Manhattan, New York for being in the top 5 out of many who took various computer related tests...I was treated like the president of a big company while I was on those trips. I stayed in a very nice hotel went to the top of the tallest building in New York, met some cool people who treated me with respect....it was a good feeling that I had anchored to those clothes....I wonder what else I can anchor that feeling too?
BLUE REFLECTORS?
I finally found the pattern, cracked the code....so to speak.....too all of you who have always wondered what the blue reflectors in the middle of the highway mean.....its not a curve or or a turnoff marker or a sign marker, or some way of letting the guy who set them know that he ran out of yellow ones.......it is an easy way for a firetruck driver to find a "Fire Hydrant"......the blue markers mark the aprox. location of a fire hydrant, usually on either side of the road within about 15 feet of that spot.....took me a few days to figure all that out....so know that your minds are at ease you can sit back and watch your friends rack their brains over it...just before you tell them....if you wish to tell them that is.....
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
Girls are so mean
Why must this girl stay so deep in my mind.... I made the mistake of assuming a girl would like me just because I put so much of my focus towards her...worked so hard to change the way things had always been with me, I have set my mind up in such a way that if she had decided to be with me or hang out with me even once I could have swept her off her feet.... I was always timid and shy and afraid to speak to girls for fear of rejection among other things, but this girl I have always liked, and in some odd way we ended up talking to each other over the Internet, after having not seen each other in almost five months....we talked about many various things, and interestingly she had so much in common with me that I was very interested in her...I felt that she was the one, the reason I had been single for so long and ended up talking to this girl again.... she had finally broke up with her questionable boyfriend...I felt things were falling into place, that it was meant to be....I had so much confidence all of a sudden, I had many different but good feelings...nothing botherd me...I loved life..............but...........once I finally asked her out.........everything changed, and quick......she canceled the date we were supposed to go on just a few hours before......I went to the fair were she went instead and she seemingly ignored me as I tried to talk to her.....she didn't talk to me very much anymore if at all.....I had made her a birthday present just for her, picked out the perfect card and wrapped it the best I could....but had no way of giving it to her....she would not let me arrange any easy way of giving it to her, I didn't know where she lived, her phone number, or when she worked.....I did what I could to let her know that she could trust me, unlike her shithead boyfriend who had broken her heart, and ruined her trust in all, including me(I suppose).....It didn't do any good................so here I am, heartbroken and confused....everything reminds me of her, red and orange cars, the F#$king radio playing romantic crap 24/7, TV always having at least 15 min of a man and woman in some cutesie romantic moment in every show on every station, my Friends rubbing it in my face(unknowingly) that they have been with someone they love for so long or are falling in love, concerts, magazines, pictures, the Internet, work, random thought, everything!......If I didn't live in such a dumb$hit town I might actually meet a girl that could end this pain, somehow distract me from this false hope that I built into my brain that in the end has ripped my mind apart.......what once raised my confidence has rendered me terrified that this will happen again possibly with all girls that I find appealing....the girl that I have spoken of still randomly talks to me, which even though is a nice surprise only seems to end up leaving me confused, frustrated and ultimately even more depressed every time. I don't know what I'm supposed to do, she still turns down every offer to hang out.....perhaps I F#%ked it up somehow, maybe she just never felt that way, I don't know...and I probly will never know, and that will always make me wonder why it never worked....what am I supposed to do?
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
More Thinking
so I was kinda pondering on my inability to achieve companionship with a nice girl, and I came to the conclusion that it may be that since I have been single for so long( and have become shy and insecure because of that)....when a girl does show interest in me I tend to focus to much on her to soon...apparently this sends the wrong "signals" and she flees in horror (so to speak)...So I guess being a nice guy isn't really the problem its the being too nice by treating a girl like a girlfriend before she is a girlfriend. I can see how that would bother a lot of girls, having a guy treat her like royalty after only knowing her for a short while...I dont intend for it to happen that way but thats how it happens to happen....So I need to find that spot between "the nice guy" class and "the friend zone" and hope it works out....but it still bugs me that girls like these dominant assholes, why try and tame a dickhead, when it takes you nowhere and ultimately breaks your heart, when you could be with a sweet guy and rough the edges a bit....I think it would feel better helpin a guy out rather than trying to keep some 'billy badass' from treating the waiter like crap....but anyway thats some more "on the drive home" thinking.....
Tuesday, September 2, 2008
Sad day....
So I was talking to a friend of mine last night, and I asked how she was doing...shortly there after I found out that her grandfather had passed away :( .....I didnt know what too say, I felt bad for her....she seemed to be having a terrible string of bad luck and this just sort of added to it.... I wanted to make her happy, anything I could do to cheer her up, to keep her from being sad.....but Im afraid this is one thing I can not be of much help in....people sort of have there own ways of dealing with death. It can make people terribly uncomfortable and act in ways unfavorable.....I think its best if I try not to tell jokes, offer a night out on the town, or even try to make light of the situation.....I hope she knows that I am here if she needs someone to talk too or whatever.....I wish the best for her and her family, and pray that her grandfather is in heaven, as an angel ready to change her luck.....
"It seems as though fate does not come without a sence of irony" - Morpheus
"It seems as though fate does not come without a sence of irony" - Morpheus
Sunday, August 24, 2008
Age Regression
So last night me and a couple of my friends went to town again, like we usually do on the weekends, and we drove around trying to find something to do or look at and even though its one of the biggest cities around here it sucks, everything closes to early and cost to much.....so after a few hours of trying to figure out what to do and watching douche bags walk around with girls that ill probly never get, because this country is so f#$ked up, we drove home......but instead of callin it a night we did somethin i havent done since i was in junior high....i have this trampoline in my back yard, ive had it for like 10 years, and we decided to try it out to see if it would hold roughly 600 pounds of bad idea......it held up pretty good and it was more fun than trying to find somethin to do in a shitty town, so while we were playin "popcorn"(one guy curls up in a ball while the others try and bounce him high enough to "pop" (`em open), travis was the "kernal" we bounced him a few good times........then we spiked him to about eye level and when he came down again, 4 spings snapped, ripping them from the material, and leaving enough slack for his tailbown to slam into the ground......it was the funniest thing ive seen all month, so if you and your friends are bored i recomend playin popcorn on a trampoline......p.s. travis was ok, no broken tailbone
Sunday, August 17, 2008
Been a while....nice guy rant
well, its been a while since my last post, so I figured i'd write one.....not much has been goin on lately, but I have been trying to figure out what the hell girls want....I mean i've been told by so many girls all the bad stuff that they hate about their boyfriends and I, being the kinda shy person wanting to jump in on the dating game, listend to this and have been trying to be as much the opposite thinking this is what girls want, a guy that they can say good things about.....but, apperently thats not what they want, that is their deffinition of a friend....ive played this game for so long, i meet a girl and we start talkin and I think things are goin good and she seems to like me, but at some point when she figures out that I actually like her, she tells me she doesnt feel that way and then she moves away.....ive read many different things about this and it just gets very confusing, and ive just decided......you have to be a dick to get noticed, you have to be rich and kinda gay looking for them to be attracted to you, and if she ever does end up liking/dating you, you must continue to be some ratio of dick to nice guy in order for it to last.....why cant a guy just be himself and tell a girl he likes her without her gettng all freaked out....(oh, your like a brother to me, i think we should just be friends.... ) i mean, give a nice guy a try, he may not be ripped, or the most popular, or the piece of $hit your used too.....but at least he'll respect you, treat you like a person, and show you a good time.....but I guess that is just how things are and thats how they are gonna stay. I hate cable tv
Labels:
bullshit,
douche bags,
girls suck,
nice guy
Sunday, March 23, 2008
Cable Sucks
So i was watchin a little TV today and after watching a few shows and flippin through the channels I started to notice how bad Tv has become since I was little. all of the good cartoons have been canceled and replaced with dramatic teenage sitcoms with no originality. The more adult stations like comedy central, sci-fi, or real.....have so many commercials selling useless products and services, like weight-loss pills, and cheap plastic devices that will give you "lean toned hardened muscles in three weeks" , all of the pills they advertise, and most of all, since its now a law that you must have car insurance to drive, we have to see all the damn car insurance commercials(and i have no idea who their target audience is there, no teenager is gonna find those stupid "esurance" commercials to be cool). Its getting ridiculous. One of the much more irritating things i have noticed is the painful increase in volume when certain commercials air. Then i noticed its not just tv thats gotten bad either, the news advertises the "worst" news as the top stories. You don't usually see something good on the cover of a newspaper anymore, its usually a car accident or how much more gas prices are despite any change of anything, (personally i think somebody's milking this gas bull for all were worth). magazines talk about the latest celeb drug/sex gossip......what happened to the encouraging cartoons that disney use to make or the good news making the cover story, or when magazines use to talk about all the great movies that good actors where in......."my o my how the times have changed"....
Saturday, March 22, 2008
New Laptop
So i got a new computer the other day. It is an Asus EEE laptop. For those who have not heard of this yet, it is a new laptop that Asus has built to be cheap, ultra portable, and easy to use. When I opened the box, I was pretty happy to see just how small this thing was, it makes regular laptops look like monsters. Its just a little to big to fit inside of a "leg pocket" of a nice pair of cargo pants....but anyway, I purchased the 4G (which means it has a 4 gig hard drive) which seems pretty small, but it has a SD card slot for more storage space. It also has built in wi-fi, a web-cam, web-mail/e-mail checker, instant messaging, games, office software (open-office), firefox web browser, and several other niffty programs. The O.S. is a modified version of xandros (Linux instead of windows), and dont let that turn you off. It uses a desktop manager to make everything easy to use and operate, and because it is Linux it will boot in ~15 sec. and can be sold much cheaper than an equivalent pc with windows. However it can be installed with windows XP if you must have it....the user manual has a step by step process on how to do that.
PROS.- very small/light
- fancy little OS with pretty good hardware support(printers and such)
- fairly reasonably priced
- good for making your friends jealous
CONS.- personally I could use a little more battery life(mine runs 3.5 Hr.)
- can get a bit warm/hot sometimes(not scary hot yet)
- ive had a little bit of trouble connecting to networked computers(to share files/printers)but that might be unrelated to the laptop
Overall 8.5 outa 10
Tuesday, March 18, 2008
Stressfull Day
well, today was a bit stressful to say the least. we received 5 pc's yesterday to be custom built, and after building them we hooked them up to get windows loaded on them..... unfortunately only one of them worked. come to find out, of the 5 pc's 3 of them had faulty BIOS chips, 1 simply would not boot at all and instead would just make multiple long beeps (most likely bad mobo), and the last one luckily seemed to work fine. So we ordered some new boards from a different company with our fingers crossed. Another thing that really bothers me at the shop is...... no matter how hard it is raining, some people find it absolutely necessary to bring their computers into the shop dripping wet( with no cover or plastic bag over it). which means if they just brought it in for a quick software fix and the rain water (unnoticed) fry's their mobo they will blame us for it. anywho this is my first post and i intend to post some more so feel free to comment....
Labels:
bad mobo,
bad motherboard,
computer problems
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)