What clothes can do for you!?!?

so I'm feeling much better today, I decided to wear my dress clothes to work today, I figured it would do me a favor along the lines of my confidence....and it certainly helped....not as much as I had hoped but it did help. One thing I noticed is how many people actually know me, and consider me a friend. I usually don't dress real nice, just some cargo pants and a comfy shirt...but when I got all spiffied up in me dress clothes everyone had a much more desirable reaction to my being there. When I went to lunch today, I went to the grocery store first(were I used to work) and I saw my friend Travis...when he finally realised who I was, he acted like seeing me all fancied up made his day, he wanted to go to lunch with me, said I was really cheerin him up(I don't think hes gay), a few of the other people I worked with also said I looked pretty good....After I left there I headed to subway to get a sandwich and a couple cookies...and even the workers there commented on me being all dressed up....I don't really know any of them, I just eat there every once in a while, but they still noticed....while at work I made a $340 sale with little effort, something that is very difficult to do at this particular job, but the customer did seem to trust me more than they did when I was in my regular "work t-shirt" uniform....I wore the clothes I wore today knowing that all the other times I had worn them, I was in a high confidence state, I went to Indianapolis, IN and Manhattan, New York for being in the top 5 out of many who took various computer related tests...I was treated like the president of a big company while I was on those trips. I stayed in a very nice hotel went to the top of the tallest building in New York, met some cool people who treated me with respect....it was a good feeling that I had anchored to those clothes....I wonder what else I can anchor that feeling too?

BLUE REFLECTORS?

I finally found the pattern, cracked the code....so to speak.....too all of you who have always wondered what the blue reflectors in the middle of the highway mean.....its not a curve or or a turnoff marker or a sign marker, or some way of letting the guy who set them know that he ran out of yellow ones.......it is an easy way for a firetruck driver to find a "Fire Hydrant"......the blue markers mark the aprox. location of a fire hydrant, usually on either side of the road within about 15 feet of that spot.....took me a few days to figure all that out....so know that your minds are at ease you can sit back and watch your friends rack their brains over it...just before you tell them....if you wish to tell them that is.....

Girls are so mean

Why must this girl stay so deep in my mind.... I made the mistake of assuming a girl would like me just because I put so much of my focus towards her...worked so hard to change the way things had always been with me, I have set my mind up in such a way that if she had decided to be with me or hang out with me even once I could have swept her off her feet.... I was always timid and shy and afraid to speak to girls for fear of rejection among other things, but this girl I have always liked, and in some odd way we ended up talking to each other over the Internet, after having not seen each other in almost five months....we talked about many various things, and interestingly she had so much in common with me that I was very interested in her...I felt that she was the one, the reason I had been single for so long and ended up talking to this girl again.... she had finally broke up with her questionable boyfriend...I felt things were falling into place, that it was meant to be....I had so much confidence all of a sudden, I had many different but good feelings...nothing botherd me...I loved life..............but...........once I finally asked her out.........everything changed, and quick......she canceled the date we were supposed to go on just a few hours before......I went to the fair were she went instead and she seemingly ignored me as I tried to talk to her.....she didn't talk to me very much anymore if at all.....I had made her a birthday present just for her, picked out the perfect card and wrapped it the best I could....but had no way of giving it to her....she would not let me arrange any easy way of giving it to her, I didn't know where she lived, her phone number, or when she worked.....I did what I could to let her know that she could trust me, unlike her shithead boyfriend who had broken her heart, and ruined her trust in all, including me(I suppose).....It didn't do any good................so here I am, heartbroken and confused....everything reminds me of her, red and orange cars, the F#$king radio playing romantic crap 24/7, TV always having at least 15 min of a man and woman in some cutesie romantic moment in every show on every station, my Friends rubbing it in my face(unknowingly) that they have been with someone they love for so long or are falling in love, concerts, magazines, pictures, the Internet, work, random thought, everything!......If I didn't live in such a dumb$hit town I might actually meet a girl that could end this pain, somehow distract me from this false hope that I built into my brain that in the end has ripped my mind apart.......what once raised my confidence has rendered me terrified that this will happen again possibly with all girls that I find appealing....the girl that I have spoken of still randomly talks to me, which even though is a nice surprise only seems to end up leaving me confused, frustrated and ultimately even more depressed every time. I don't know what I'm supposed to do, she still turns down every offer to hang out.....perhaps I F#%ked it up somehow, maybe she just never felt that way, I don't know...and I probly will never know, and that will always make me wonder why it never worked....what am I supposed to do?